"The mark of an immature man is that he would die knobly for a cause. The mark of a mature man is that he would live humbly for one" - Catcher in the Rye -WARNING WRITER SPELLING CHALLENGED! But Sometimes you have to say "what the fuck!"

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Holidaze and Freddie Mercury

REPOST FROM 11/21/04

Killer Queen Freddie
Bitch is Back

I've paid my dues -
Time after time -
I've done my sentence
But committed no crime -
And bad mistakes
I've made a few
I've had my share of sand kicked in my face -
But I've come through

We are the champions - my friends
And we'll keep on fighting - till the end -
We are the champions -
We are the champions
No time for losers
'Cause we are the champions - of the world -

I've taken my bows
And my curtain calls -
You brought me fame and fortuen and everything that goes with it
I thank you all -

But it's been no bed of roses
No pleasure cruise -
I consider it a challenge before the whole human race -
And I ain't gonna lose -

We are the champions - my friends
And we'll keep on fighting - till the end -
We are the champions -
We are the champions
No time for losers
'Cause we are the champions - of the world –

Sometimes I need to blast this song over and over. Its motivational music used in difficult times. Though I have computer access again, it’s dial-up and very hard to use. It’s slow, and impossible to go anywhere without it taking years to download.

Last night I had some drinks with a friend, Merlot and Shiraz. I’m a total wine connoisseur. It tasted really good and felt good too. I figure for special occasions I can drink;, it was my friends 52 birthday and all. Today, I felt hung-over and tired, and slept most of the day.

I started feeling depressed when I could not find my tabby cat Figaro. Last night I gave him a flea pill at 2 in the morning. He had been having irritation and reaction to the fleas and the Advantage. My black alpha male Crookshanks, is doing just fine. Figaro was losing fur and looking pretty shabby. Since I gave him that pill, I haven’t seen him. It’s now 8:00 at night. He didn’t come for food today at all. He could have gotten out when I smoked a cigarette, I don’t know. I’m scared he is sick and dying somewhere in my apartment. I’m so scared he is dead, or going to die. I’m just freaking out, and I’m scared to look because of what I will find. Crookshanks, I’m hoping, would let me know if something was wrong with his brother. He isn’t acting weird. I’m just freaking out, and getting sad and scared.

I always get depressed over the holidays and my birthday too. It fucking sucks, but it always seems to happen. I don’t know if my drinking wine is making this worse, or just my stresses about moving. I’m just having a semi panic-depression attack. I’m not telling you so you can feel sorry for me. I feel sorry enough for myself. I guess, if anyone can understand depression, and seasonal depression, you can relate. I just feel as if I am sinking down. If something has happened to my cat, its gonna really, really hurt me. I’m just praying it all will be okay. Hence, the Freddie Mercury. Just gotta keep listening to my Freddie and plugging away and surviving. We are the Champions!

The King

I miss you Freddie! Thank you for your guidance and inspiration. We love you.

Give Me My Vibrator or Give Me Death!

President Bush,
I respect your recent win and I pledge to support you for the next four years. But please, I beg you, don’t take my vibrators away. I cant live without my daily orgasms, and my vibrator works so much better than the bathtub faucet or a shower massager. Plus, my hand gets really tired from rubbing so hard. Maybe I’m lazy, but nothing sets me off into an orgasm more than my vibrator. I just pray to God that I never have to go without it.

Support Our Troops
I think if we really want to support the wives of our Troops at war, we need to make sure they all have vibrators. I would like to start a group in collaboration with Operation Take One For the County, how about Operation Vibrate For Our Country? This group would provide vibrators and masturbation techniques to all the wives and girlfriends of our Troops serving overseas. I think this would greatly reduce the number of “Dear John” letters, and also empower these women sexually. I’m sure our “Boys” overseas would appreciate the efforts.

Vibrating Love
I use my vibrators when I’m alone and needing to relax and I also use my vibrator during sex. My vibrator helps keep me lubricated, which enables me to withstand hours and hours of cock pounding sex. Using a vibrator helps during anal sex, providing the utmost high. I have multiple orgasms during sex, thanks to my vibrator. My partner appreciates it too, because it’s less work for him and he so likes watching me squirm and gush when I cum.

Such a Full-Filling Experience
One of my boyfriends used to like to use vibrators in all my holes, with a massager on my clit and then stick his dick in my mouth. He loved to make me cum that way, and would always say I was “Full-Filled”. Vibrators totally enhance the love making experience and I believe we should all have safe access to them.

Naughty, Naughty Boy
One of my boyfriends used to like me to stick a lubricated vibrator up his ass. This was kinda fun in a Dominatrix style way. He also used to like to suck on the end of my reality shaped vibrator. I admit this turned me on too. Ah well different strokes for different folks.

I’m just saying we should all be able to use vibrators and sex toys in the privacy of our own homes. Please don’t take this right away from us.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Vader’s Celexa (stolen and modified from Nirvana’s Lithium)

REPOST From 12/2/04

I’m so happy ’cause today
I’ve fought some demons ...
They’re in my head
I’m so ugly, but that’s okay, ’cause so are you ...
We’ve broken our mirrors
Monday morning is everyday for all I care ...
And I’m not scared
Light my bubbler, in a daze
’cause I’ve found god
Yeah (x6)

I’m so lonely but that’s okay, I colored my hair ...
It’s flaming RED
And just maybe I’m to blame for all I’ve heard ...
But I’m not sure
I’m so excited, I can’t wait to meet you there ...
But I don’t care
I’m so horny, but that’s okay ...
Boytoy’s feel GOOD

I like it - I’m not gonna crack
I miss you - I’m not gonna crack
I love you - I’m not gonna crack
I killed you - I’m not gonna crack

As Eddie Vedder once said “I’m still alive”. Sometimes Im the walking dead Tim Robbins style. Other times Im as happy and perky as a sick and twisted John Huges film. Mostly Im numb and overwhelmed by all the shit I must do. Its easier to run and hide, then climb my mountain of tasks. With time running out, my short-timer syndrome has culminated completely.
Due to recent “black ass” bouts, my Celexa doubled dosed. This should keep me sane through the holidaze and move. Like fellow Pisces, depressed artist and Warshingtonian, Kurt Kobain said so well “I’m not gonna crack”. Unlike him, I wont go killing myself. Its something I think about, but the love of my child will always keep me going. Suicide is the most selfish of solutions.
Thanks again for your comments and support. My blog has been acting crazy from all the photos. I can’t open any links, and I doubt you guys can too. Sorry about that. I think of you all often, and send you love. I promise to come a visiting you soon. (hopefully tonight)

That terrible mood of depression of whether it's any good or not is what is known as The Artist's Reward.
Ernest Hemingway

This is my depressed stance. When you're depressed, it makes a lot of difference how you stand. The worst thing you can do is straighten up and hold your head high because then you'll start to feel better. If you're going to get any joy out of being depressed, you've got to stand like this
Charlie Brown

Give Me My Sex, Drugs, and RocknRoll....As Nasty as I Wanna Be!

Repost from 11/6/04 CENSORED

Government of the people
For the people
By the people

[News reporter]:
Earlier today in Broward County,
appalling courtjudges upheld the previousruling
to ban the sale of Miami rap group the 2 Live Crew's
double-platinum album,
"Nasty As They Wanna Be," in Broward County.

[Someone else commenting]
"We think it's the banning of free speech.
First Amendment protects material, resultably."

Luke (being interviewed):
"We don't talk about, uh, harrassing and sexually
brutalizing women in my music, man!"
"We don't do that in my music, man! I'm tired of you
saying that!"

Verse 1: [Fresh Kid Ice]
We've got white-collar people trying to grab our style
Saying we're too nasty and we're 2 Live
Corrupted politicians playing games
Bringing us down to boost their fame
They must be joking thinking we will fall
But they're like flies movin' the wall
We stand tall from beginning to end
With the help from fans and all our friends
Freedom of speech will never die
For us to help, our ancestors died
Don't keep thinking that we will quit
We'll always stand and never sit
We're 2 live, 2 black, 2 strong
Doing the right thing, and not the wrong
So listen up, y'all, to what we say
We won't be banned in the U.S.A.!

Chorus: (3x)
Banned in the USA, I was

"Luke's concerts are for adults"

[Luke] (being interviewed):
"If it's an adult show you have to be 18"
"Our record is a year old, but with all the publicity,
there's a lot of people ... curiosity is around!"
"We're selling records to a totally different
"I take a precaution that nobody else has not stickered my
album, I made
TWO versions, two versions two versions.."

Verse 2: [Brother Marquis]
The First Amendment gave us freedom of speech
So what you sayin'? It didn't include me?
I like to party and have a good time
There's nothin' but pleasure written in our rhyme
I know you don't think we'll ever quit
We've got some people on our side who won't take your lip
We're gonna do all the things we wanna do
You can't stand to see a brother get as rich as you
This is the 90s and we're conin' on strong
Sayin' things and doin' things that you're sayin's wrong
Wisen up, 'cause on Election Day,
We'll see who's banned in the U.S.A.!

The United States of America
Government of the people
The United States of America
For the people
The United States of America
By the people
By the people

[Luke] (being interviewed):
"The show in Hollywood, that was for 21-and-over people,
they had police out there, cars of the people coming in the
and they still arrested us for performing in front of

[Luke] speech:
What is this??
Is this not America?
This is not China!
This is not Russia!
This is not the place where they brought down the wall, this is
We have the right to say what we want to say,
we have the right to do what we want to do,
and what I do in my house, you might not do in your house!
So what I do in my house is my business!
And the simple fact of it all is that we are BONDED by the First
We have the freedom of EXPRESSION!
We have the freedom of CHOICE!
And you, Chinese, black, green, purple, Jew,
YOU have the right to listen to whoever you want to, and even
the 2 Live Crew!
So all you right-wingers, left-wingers, bigots, Communists,
there IS a place for you in this world!
Because this is the land of the FREE, the home of the BRAVE!
And 2 Live is what we are
-"Banned in the USA" 2 Live Crew

Vader believes in personal liberty. Personal religious beliefs should NEVER be mixed in government. What I do to my body is my business.

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the freedom of press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances. (Amendment 1,The Constitution of the United States.)

I believe in my rights guaranteed under the first amendment. To me, this is the freedom for lots of sex, drugs, and rocknroll.

If I want to have anal sex, that is my business. If I want to masturbate with dildos and vibrating pearl rabbits, that too is my business. If I want to have a hot, wicked lesbian threesome…that’s my choice, and my right. I should have full access to porn, if Im purchasing it from an adult establishment as an adult. Shit, if I covet and fuck my neighbors wife, that is still my choice, just because its morally wrong, it should not make it illegal. I have control of my body. If I chose to get pregnant as a teenager, and keep my child, that is my choice. If I get raped, and chose to have an abortion, its my right to have safe access. My body, my choice.

If I want to smoke pot, and use it as medicine for migraine or menstrual cramps that should be my right. Hell, I should be able to GROW my own plants for personal use. That is my right. I should be able to chose what I want to put into my body for medicinal value. Hell, if I want to smoke a cigarette or drink a beer after work, that is my right too. If I want to shoot myself up with heroine, let me do it. What good does the drug war serve other than to reinforce the power of the gangs and underworld?

I believe in artistic freedom, and freedom of expression. Musicians should not be banned, no matter how offensive they may be. Even the Klu Klux Klan has a right to protest and gather, as much as I hate those fockers. I consider the work of Robert Mapplethorpe fine art. We should all have access to public library books without censorhip. Pee-Wee Herman should not be harassed for his taste in art. I stand behind the words of 2 Live Crew.

Fuck this hypersensitive, over-religious moral crusade to save the world.



The state of a free person; exemption from subjection to the will of another claiming ownership of the person or services; freedom; -- opposed to slavery, serfdom, bondage, or subjection.

Freedom from imprisonment, bonds, or other restraint upon locomotion.

A privilege conferred by a superior power; permission granted; leave; as, liberty given to a child to play, or to a witness to leave a court, and the like.

Privilege; exemption; franchise; immunity enjoyed by prescription or by grant; as, the liberties of the commercial cities of Europe.

The place within which certain immunities are enjoyed, or jurisdiction is exercised.

A certain amount of freedom; permission to go freely within certain limits; also, the place or limits within which such freedom is exercised; as, the liberties of a prison.

A privilege or license in violation of the laws of etiquette or propriety; as, to permit, or take, a liberty.

The power of choice; freedom from necessity; freedom from compulsion or constraint in willing.

They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.
- Benjamin Franklin

In every country and in every age, the priest has been hostile to liberty. He is always in alliance with the despot...
- Thomas Jefferson

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time, with the blood of patriots and tyrants.
- Thomas Jefferson

Of liberty I would say that, in the whole plenitude of its extent, it is unobstructed action according to our will. But rightful liberty is unobstructed action according to our will within limits drawn around us by the equal rights of others. I do not add 'within the limits of the law,' because law is often but the tyrant's will, and always so when it violates the right of an individual
- Thomas Jefferson

Liberty has never come from government. Liberty has always come from the subjects of government. The history of liberty is the history of resistance.
- Woodrow Wilson


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