"The mark of an immature man is that he would die knobly for a cause. The mark of a mature man is that he would live humbly for one" - Catcher in the Rye -WARNING WRITER SPELLING CHALLENGED! But Sometimes you have to say "what the fuck!"

Friday, May 21, 2004

Breaking up and dating.... UGH!

Dating games... Whoever in the hell started playing these sadistic games should be shot and killed. (well not shot and killed, but maybe tortured).
(Sigh)
Im just getting out of a 3 year relationship. Im not used to these games here. I call it like I see it, I say what I mean. I hated being controlled in the 3 year relationship. I also started feeling used for sex. Not that I dont *LOVE* sex, but I want to have it when I want it, I dont want to be pressured or shamed into having it. It just got old, and weird, so I broke it off.
Now comes the dating games part. Ive kinda done the "Im out of a long term relationship so lets go hog wild thang", which, I dont know is too healthy or safe. I have this wild friend who considers sailors "disposable sex toys" and considers Samantha from Sex in the City to be her mentor. We have been hanging out and I have been kinda doing the free love liberated punk rock chick thing. Ive had some fun, but it also has kinda sucked. Thought nothing would make me miss my ex, but, this club scene dating has.
I meet this cute young boy (23 sailor), who is 10 years younger than I dancing at a club. We kiss and exchange numbers. He calls a couple days later, I call him back, we talk about getting together. We get together a couple of times, have sex (I know should have waited, but again Im doing the liberated woman thang) and bam, the guy doesnt call me for 5 days. I thought the sex was pretty good too, and I made it clear I didnt want a relationship, so I dont think I scared him off by pressuring him. So now, Im sitting here waiting by the phone, for some young ass boy to call me. Im too old for this shit, is the first thing that comes to my mind. But my ego does not appreciate getting the brush off. RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. How DARE he, doesnt he know who I am (LOL). I hate waiting for the phone to ring, I forgot this part of dating games. I was so used to being in a relationship and calling whenever the fuck you feel like it. Ive read that its okay for guys to wait DAYS before they call you back, but every girl I talk to thinks thats rude. The sad thing is I still want to see him, and rock his young ass world some more.
Oh well... the pleasures of dating.

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