"The mark of an immature man is that he would die knobly for a cause. The mark of a mature man is that he would live humbly for one" - Catcher in the Rye -WARNING WRITER SPELLING CHALLENGED! But Sometimes you have to say "what the fuck!"

Tuesday, July 20, 2004

Sex, Lies and Videotape

Gimme my shit… BIATCH!
After a breakup when does it become okay to get your shit back? Do you do it right away like an emotional psycho chick, or do you wait a while for things to cool down? Getting back personal items from an ex is always a problem after a breakup. Should you just say "fuck it" and forget about it? Or should you take some friend, or new boyfriend, over to help you reclaim what is yours?

The X
This is the dilemma I find myself in after my break up last march with X. Granted, I have things of his like his house key, car key, old high school id cards, and a couple of T-shirts. Minor possessions really, things that can be replaced, and/or locks that can be changed. He has never really asked for his things back, though I don’t want them, and I could really care less about having them.

Hardcore possessions
Now, it’s the shit of MINE that he has that really upsets me. If it was a T-shirt or some shoes, yeah, no big deal. But this X has some very, very personal items….. my porn collection, lingerie, panties, my bondage toys, my sex books and oh yeah some home videos we made accompanied by X-rated Polaroid’s. Now, what should someone do in this situation? Yes, X has blackmail material that he could post on the internet and show the world, he also has my favorite lingerie and my porn collection….. Damnit I want it all back!

Sex, lies and videotape
How does one approach this delicate situation? I’m at a total loss here. Should I go over and demand my personal items back? Should I hold him at fingernail point and demand that he burn all incriminating photos and videos? This is one of the reasons NOT to do home movies with someone, you think its all fun and sex at the time, and then when you break up, they have instant blackmail over you.

Amateur porn stars
These home movies are really bad too. We totally did the "lets make a home porn thang" I mean full on wild nasty sex, no holds bar sex…. Everything. Yep, Vader is on tape being the ultimate slut. I mean shit, it was fun at the time, there is nothing like being filmed as you are being a dirty whore, but shit, when you brake up with that person, what happens to the evidence? What is the appropriate etiquette for this?

What is the appropriate?
How do you politely and discreetly ask for those personal items? Part of me wants him to think I don’t give a damn, and I don’t really. But I would like my lingerie and panties back, and my sex toys, porn collection and most important the home movies. If anyone has ever experienced a situation like this before please let me know. I broke it off with X, and he is still pretty angry at me. I wanted to be friends, but he couldn’t handle that. He wanted, sex, sex and sex. I love sex, but I just didn’t want to do it with him anymore.
Any advice?

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6 comments:

Zelda said...

I'd try calling and being really polite and asking if it's cool if you pick up your stuff. Tell him you appreciate him being cool about it and maybe buy him something cheap as a token. It is perhaps bribery, but you could look at it as an investment in getting all of your expensive stuff back. Perhaps if you are really cool about it, you might even be friends.

Big James said...

WOW

Jenny said...

Hi, just wanted to drop by and say thank you for your comments in my blog today. I really appreciated them.
I checked out your post about the military. Just wanted to say thanks for your support. I know it must be appreciate. Good luck to your brother, I am wishing him all the best.
Oh, and good luck with your x problems. Yikes, sticky situation.

Tricia said...

I'm coming in your email again!

Knott said...

Yikes, that's a bitch. I think the calling and being polite things is worth a shot, but if that doesn't work... Well, if you know a couple of guys who are a LOT bigger than him who would be willing to drop by and help you persuade him, that might be the ticket.
I myself learned the hard way in an early relationship, so when my X wife and I split, I made it a point to return the next day while she was at work and get EVERYTHING and then some.
Hope it all works out for you.

Vadergrrrl said...

Hey Thanks for all your comments. I also have haloscan comments set up.

Knotts, Im trying to find you but it says I cant access your profile. If you go to my site and leave the comments in HaloScan then I can access you.

xxxxooooooooo

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