"The mark of an immature man is that he would die knobly for a cause. The mark of a mature man is that he would live humbly for one" - Catcher in the Rye -WARNING WRITER SPELLING CHALLENGED! But Sometimes you have to say "what the fuck!"

Wednesday, June 02, 2004

Small Town Sluts vs. Urban Sluts

Having lived and been single in both a redneck/sailor hoppin small town vs. a kickin urban area (like Seattle, DC, San Francisco) I have found there to be a major difference in the types of sluts, or what even constitutes a slut in these places.

Small town sluts. These girls generally suffer from “looking for daddy syndrome”, i.e. they are missing the father figure in their life and look to cheap sex for attention. Small town sluts can also be lonely or bored wives, typically heavyset and somewhat unattractive, who turn to sex as validation for their visual shortcomings. Small town sluts can also be the beautiful small town girl who is in constant need for attention and validation. Small town sluts can often have a drug problem, or at least a weakness for methamphetamine powders. Small town sluts frequent the same bar until they have slept with too many of the regulars and need to “move on”. The wardrobes for a small town slut consists of tight jeans, low-cut blouse, open toed sandals with “fuck me” heals, heavily hairsprayed and teased hair, dark lipstick, and long acrylic nails.
Small town sluts generally feel bad about being a slut and consider the word offensive. Let me give some examples of a small town slut. My friend Mary, who is a married navy wife gets an “itch” every time her hubby is at sea. She calls up Eunice and pressures her to go out cattin. Mary and Eunice dress to the nines, get all shaved and waxed, and head to the bar. Mary proceeds to make Eunice look like a prude (which is hard to do) by making out with 3 different guys on the dance floor, inviting 2 of them back to Eunice’s for an after party, and sleeping with both. Mary carries on affairs with various sailors and townies until hubby returns, only to discover she is pregnant and has to abort the baby (since she doesn’t know who the father is). Mary already has two kids from two different sailors (she actually married both because she was pregnant).
Popular Culture equivalent – Mystic Pizza

Urban Sluts. Now these chicks cultivate and reclaim the world slut. Their experiences include both genders and multiple numbers. They come from diverse backgrounds and generally think of sex in a casual way, separating it from love or any type of attachment. Urban sluts are not easily recognizable, and at times it seems like everyone and anyone may be an urban slut, if not in practice than in preaching. It is not uncommon to be at a Fetish club and find that the only non-urban sluts there to be the employees working as dominatrixes and strippers. Urban sluts have a variety of places to mix, hang out and socialize. They love art, film, adult entertainment, Stranger personal adds, fine wine and literature. Hanging out with them you feel prude for being in a monogomous relationship. Urban Sluts are proud to be called sluts, and will even call themselves or other friends “sluts” in casual conversation. I will give you some examples. My friend Allison loved sex, had her tongue pierced, and also decided to try bisexuality while majoring in Women Studies at Berkeley. Having too many lovers to count, Allison loved to talk dirty to whoever and whomever, and always promised that she could do things sexually that other girls were ashamed or too scared to do. Allison had been having an affair with a boy, Orion, who also loved sex and had slept with many of Allison’s friends. One night, Allison and Orion ran into each other at a bar, Allison was with her friend Kristen. Both Kristen and Allison decided they wanted Orion, so they made a promise to him that they would take him back home and have a threesome. That is what they did, and bragged to whomever about. Both Kristen and Allison continued to have flings and “private parties” with each other and “lucky men” throughout that semester. Allison was proud to be a slut, and had stories of seducing teachers, boyfriends, fathers, and sisters alike.
Popular Culture equivalent – Sex in the City

What is a SLUT?
I found this site that says it all. Being a slut may be a fad or a lifestyle. I tend to think of it as a mindframe or choice. I think it is good to be in love and monogomous. But, if you are single, go rock your socks off, have fun, and yeah women can be "studs" too.

Definitions of Slut

Zen Slut From Zenslut.com

(note: links go to definitions at dictionary.com, though i pulled the definitions from my desktop dictionary.)
slut [slut] n.: 1. a dirty, slovenly woman. 2. a sexually promiscuous woman --slut'tish adj.
that definition being filled with a few adjectives of its own, i looked some of them up for better context:
dirty [dirt' y] adj. -i-er -i-est 1. not clean. 2. obscene. 3. contemptable or nasty. 4. unfair; dishonest. 5. rough, as weather. -vt., vi. dirt'ied, dirt'y-ing to make or become dirty -dirt'i-ness n.
sloven adj. a careless, untidy person. -slov'en-ly, -lier, -liest, adj
promiscuous adj. 1. consisting of different elements indiscriminantly mingled. 2. characterized by a lack of discrimination, esp. in sexual liasons -prom-is-cu-i-it-y, pl. -ities, n. -pro-mis'cu-ous-ly adv.

This is from Zen Slut.com - I didnt write it, but I agree totally

as a woman who challenges society's baggage around the word "slut," and readily embraces it, i would like to offer a different interpretation of the word. i propose that a slut is a sexually empowered woman. a slut is a woman who embraces her sexuality and refuses to let anyone else own it but herself. a slut is a woman who enjoys her sexuality, REVELS in her sexuality, and fucks as her wont is will. she is NOT indiscriminate; to the contrary, she choses only to sleep with people who respect her choices, and her ultimate authority over her own body. she won't sleep with just anybody, but only with people who deserve to share in the awesome sexual power she possesses. she is NOT ashamed; she is powerful, proud, righteous, and deserving of R-E-S-P-E-C-T.
how do you know if you're a slut? you're a slut if YOU say you are. it can be an empowering word when it is applied to oneself out of respect for the power of one's sexuality, rather than slurred as an epitaph by a jilted lover. the more of us women (and, hell, men) who embrace the word with a positive connotation, the closer we get to living in a society that values the power of female sexuality as equally as it values male sexuality. if you ever find yourself in a situation where someone is slinging the label "slut" at you as if it's something you should be ashamed of, tell them "thank you," and smile when you say it. i do.

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4 comments:

jp said...

Admit it, you want me. :o)

Thanks for reading my site too. I think you're the first "stranger" to find me.

jp said...

Ok, now that we've established that you want me, now what? :o)

Kidding - Like I said before, your rants are great. You have the exact sense of humor as I do. That's rare to find in a female. Do you know how to set up links? If so, I'll link you on my page if you link me here. Deal???

David said...

People are fucking disgusting. Either that, or it is the lens that is distorting the image. In any case, I really don't understand how people can live with themselves anyway. Maybe if I parked in front of the television more often, I would be dumb enough to get it.

And I'll bet you nothing in particular sets this town apart from any other town. I'll bet you these people are EVERYWHERE, scurrying into the cracks of every single city in this country. This is similar to talking to people that come from other locations who are always ranting about the "local" traffic conditions. The fog of memory distorts all. No place is any different from another, unfortunately. It's just easier to filter the signal from the noise in a small town.

Vadergrrrl said...

Now, Now, David... Whose sounding bitter now? LOL
Yes, peoople are naughty everywhere, but in a military town it does give some slutty wives the numbers advantage now doesnt it?

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