"The mark of an immature man is that he would die knobly for a cause. The mark of a mature man is that he would live humbly for one" - Catcher in the Rye -WARNING WRITER SPELLING CHALLENGED! But Sometimes you have to say "what the fuck!"

Sunday, June 06, 2004

I think I was a little out of control....

Well sometimes vodka and I do not mix. Ever see that movie with Bruce Willis, blind date? Kim Bassinger acts all crazy when she drinks and does some wacky things? Well that was kinda me the other night, or any night I go out and whup it up. Vadergrrrl becomes a crazy ass girl.

So, my teenage jock son was spending the evening away at some baseball team male bonding night. I’m thinkin I’m free, time to party on like Garth. I have a few glasses of wine at my house to get myself in the mood for a night out on the town. Now, mind you in my hometown a “night on the town” consist of choosing from various old man bars, to redneck jukebox pool halls, to sailor meat market dancin, to live townie music venues, to townie karayoke fest. We kinda managed to do all of the above, and I made sure and drank at every stop. Now, mind you, I think the townie music is good, I even enjoy the bands that come from Seattle. I think however that after being the girlfriend of a local musician for a couple years (my last boyfriend) burned me out on that scene. But that is for another story. Back to last night.

Bar #1 and tattoo parlor hell raisin
After drinking the wine to get myself ready, I head down to the first stop, the local bar that features northwestern alternative-ish music. The bank hasn’t started playing yet, so I avoid paying a cover at the door (this makes a big difference when you are broke). So I get to the bar and have a couple vodka (double) and redbulls. I’m feeling rather lit, and happy, when my friend decides to get pierced. Her other friend had her chin pierced earlier that day. We all load up, and decide to head to the tattoo parlor. We stop at a tattoo parlor opened by a friend of mine. He wasn’t there, so I “name dropped” upon entering and said my friend wanted her “clitoris pierced”. Of course, she wanted her lip pierced (on her face), but I, feeling rather buzzed, continued to make jokes anyway. See, this obnoxious character sometimes comes out of me, a wild child who could give a fuck what other people think of her. While my friend was pierced, my mouth was goin and goin. We flirted with the tattooed and pierced guys and then proceeded to move onto another bar.

Bar hoppin crazy train

This bar was the old man bar, mullets were hanging out everywhere with a tiny scattering of sailors. I had another drink and began yelling “its flash Friday” in the bar and enticing my friends to flash the mullet heads. A couple flashed us (AHHHHHHH) and we flashed the bar (but towards the wall where no one was sitting except a couple Bremolos who pretend not to the spectacle). So, not enough excitement there for us, and we decided to try another bar. We arrive at the bar (I had never been to before and had been rumored the Banditos biker gang hangs out at). This bar has a line out front with girls scantily clad, and a couple of guys in cowboy hats all waiting to go inside. We decide we will never patronage a bar in this town that keeps us waiting out front (Don’t they know who WE are???), so we decide to go to the sailor meat market dance club. Here I have 2 more drinks and do a little dancing with my friends and talking to a couple guys who went to school in the area when I did. We played the ol’ “do you know so-in-so game”. I was officially drunk at this point, but having fun, and talking up a storm. We decided to go back to the bar with the line out front. When we get back there was no line so we go in to find a Karayoke party. I have two more drinks here. In between Karayoke, the dj plays hip-hop top 40 and we dance. We dance to a couple’s rendition of John Travolta and Olivia Newton John’s Summer Lovin that included graphic sexual descriptions. I decide to sing Karayoke and pick the Dyvinals "I touch myself” When my name is called I get up there and started dancing and touching my breasts, and thighs, and getting all nasty and crazy. I also insert “when I think about your cock I touch myself” Yes, I was makin a spectacle. I later danced with some townie in a flannel that my friend picked up. We were all three dancing together and I’m wackin my friend and the townie on the ass, we sandwiched the townie, and then I grabbed his privates. Luckily the night was ending after this, my friend took the townie home for a night of talking, and I hung out with my computer geek friend eating pasta and doing computer fun until I sobered up enough to drive.

I fucked up!
Hungover like hell, I slept the next day until 5:00. Missed my son’s baseball game, flaked on a bunch of commitments, and basically spent the day recovering. I definitely feel like shit, even somewhat depressed for being such a wild thang, actin a fool, and then flaking on the world the next day. I may be too old for this shit, I dunno, It also never ceases to amaze me how crazy I act, golly gee wilikers. Egads! I have to laugh at myself, but I still can’t believe how I acted.

I think I will be staying away from vodka for a while. I need to quit smoking too. I love the hang over depression days…. You question a lot about yourself the next day. Oh well, onward upward. Cheers (with water)!

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Tricia said...

Oh my GOD,
you and I could get into so much trouble together heeheehee!

I'm lauging my ass off!
I'll be back to read it again. This is just too funny familiar.
It's stirring up so many drunken half memories...I'll have to post another comment when I get back from taking the kids to see Harry Potter.
Thanks...needed that laugh!
I prefer drunken piercing myself!
I have many closed holes that were the result of too much te'kill'ya.

Anonymous said...

Dearheart, you forgot about singing karaoke. "I Touch Myself" while touching yourself...then changing the words....hmmmm, yes, that was a little disturbing..."I fuck myself"???...you're crazy....wuv ya! -The Original Punk Rock Girl (haha)

Coach Yoda said...

Ahhhh, I see you've fallen hard to the dark side. There is still hope. You're father came back over.

Just remember, use the force!

jakethelad said...

Interesting, wild and well .... Why weren't you around when I was a young buck. We could have been together in the same cell instead of me being there with some other losers. Give us more to read. Stay safe, if that's at all possible. Look after her Tricia.

Debra said...

Oh wow! See, that was a wild night! Somebody better keep an eye on you and your exhibitional singing there- but sounds like you had fun while it lasted.

Hope your son didn't get too upset about you missing the game, and your head feels much better!

Now as for quitting smoking, it's damned hard work. I've bene smoke free for 4 weeks? 5 weeks? after smoking for 10 years. Everytime I get in the car I want one, but so far so good. I am resisting the temptation.

And thanks for the link! :)

David said...

All right... I think these are almost better than the post itself... (the tune of a x-mas song) Closed holes tea-keelya,
fuck myself crazy,
you are father come back over,
new co-ed prisons,
resisting temp-tation,
debra we try to keep control of her,
yet the girl just won't calm the hell down
Ahem... I promise I won't do that again... I'm up WAAAYY too early...

David said...

My apologies, it was in fun... let the flogging commence

David Tavares-Dias said...

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See ya!

Anonymous said...

Hey, pretty kool your blog, eh? My interests are so like yours! Do you wanna marry me? Hahahaha! Visit my as well and leave comments! The address is www.mynameishotdog.blogger.com.br

See ya!

jp said...

Dude, if you want to be anonymous, please be sure not to post your name first. ;o)

And Vadergrrrrrrrrrl, were you the one that kissed me Saturday night? The memory is really, really fuzzy right now.

Vadergrrrl said...

Hey guys, thanks for the support. Still recovering here from my "walk on the wildside" weekend. Something about partying that hard always makes me feel like a depressed loser the next couple of days. I just have to remember what Booger says in Risky Business "sometimes you gotta say what the fuck, if you cant say it you cant do it!"
Words of wisdom from Booger.

Michael said...

Great post, Vadergrrrl. Glad you don't black out on the evening when you're drinking. If you didn't remember what happened, we wouldn't get to read about it the next day--except for maybe in the police reports ;)

Jenn said...

Oh girl,
I feel for you the next day always sucks! I can't say I want to relive my party days of old, I don't remember a lot of it but everyone said I always had a good time, I do remember waking up in strange places with even stranger people, I was a very friendly drunk! Maybe a little to friendly!

Debra said...

David, you oughta prepare yourself! Me and my wet noodle are ready to begin the flogging!

Unless of course you agree to kitten-sit. I have 6 7 week old kittens running rampant around the yard getting into everything!


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